I get in a lot of trouble trying to defend myself. Someone says something, I respond, and then they really get angry. Why don't explanations make things better? And why don't I learn from my mistakes?
Should I just let it be? There is that expression about adding insult to injury. The alternative seems to be to let it be according to both the Beatles and a Zen koan.
I've given others the advice that if you add wood to a fire you'll hardly squelch it. Rather, you make the fire hotter and last longer. Why don't I take my own advice?
I've also used the expression that it is better to be right than alive. Letting it be seems closer to being alive. A flower is trampled on. Does it rise up and hit the trampled? Or does it simple enjoy its new posture?
The flower didn't exactly do anything to cause its trampling. It just happened to be growing in the wrong place. Yet, if it were human, it might have taken its trampling as personal as I often do.
When I dig a little deeper I often find that my trampling had little to do with the situation at hand. Often someone had a bad day or week, and I'm available to be stomped upon. Again, turning the other cheek seems like a better way to cool the flames.
P.S. I talked this over with my wife. She suggested saying, "I'm sorry." How can some people be so smart?
P.S.S. Then I let my wife read this. She said, “You know, there is one other possibility.” "What’s that," I said. “That you are wrong.”