Hi

Practice

Not Art

Waiters

Here

Fotographer

Muffin

I was fortunate to participate today in an IFS (Internal Family Systems) demo. I asked about “impulse control” so I was the guinea pig. I don’t have a lot of impulse control. In IFS, such parts as Impulser dances with the Manager, who wants to lock him out of the house. That way Impulser gets suppressed and all is well until they aren’t. Of course, Impulser is very persistent, saying, “I want it and I want it now.” Manager understands this and decides to work with Impulser. In fact, if these two incongruous beings could have a better relationship there wouldn’t be so much grief for me. J brought over 3 chocolate chip muffins baked by her daughter E as a thank you for something we did for her. I had my lunch finally at 3pm, and then ate one of the muffins. They were still warm, and “out of this world,” so two would be better and three, the best. Manager has a way of patiently smiling at Impulser and saying, “Wait and it will be better.” Impulser is noting the wisdom of his boss, and remembers the mantra he learned when he was a short-order cook, “Whatever you say, boss… I’ll give it a try.” But now for the real test. There are two muffins left. Impulser wants to fill each of my cheeks with one. Manager wants to offer one to Linda who so nicely just made me a bowl of tea. I could save one for tomorrow and one for the next day. Impulser says eat one now and one in 5 minutes. “You deserve it,” he says to himself. Manager says, “My God, you could give one to Linda  and have a muffin tomorrow if you hold off. Think how good that will be. I know this putting off is difficult, Impulser. But isn’t the reward greater than the deprivation? You aren’t even hungry. One was great. I know you’ll like another one too… but did you know, most of our taste is with the first bite?” “Really?” said Impulser. “Yes,” said Manager.

Trial of Science

Cooties

Seclusion

Choice

Upper Crust

Loci in Muddy Water

Horror

Mario (actually now I remember his name was Salvador. I think. Mario was a son.)

Setting Fire to My Life

Beach Balls

How Adaptable R We?

Cabin Fever

Wordsworth

Avoid As You Would The Plague

Sh.t

Voice

Them

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4URRp39XOo

19

Goat

6 Feet Under

101.333

Forest Monk

The Uninstructed Worldling

I get anxious when I’m running out of time. H, because he’s a good friend, would tell me that is normal, and why should I fret about it. I fret about it because I don’t like the way it feels. I feel anxious. I feel like my body is uncomfortable. I feel like screaming. I feel like smashing my static hearing aid into the sidewalk which I really didn’t do. And this happens everyday, and everyday I respond the same way. I could blame the hearing aid people because it was getting late and my hearing aid was still buzzing. And tomorrow it will be something else. Maybe Mensa’s computer screen will turn to a snowstorm just when I need to go online, like it did yesterday. I feel like an ER doc, dealing with one thing after another, always with the restraint of time. Yes, I’m an uninstructed worldling, as Buddha called it. The question is what can I do about it. I do realize it is happening, which is supposed to be the first step. But what is the second step? I say to myself, or tonight to Mensa, who was on the phone with me as my aids were being adjusted. She calmly said that she’d stay with me as long as it took. Was she talking about tonight or the next 50 years? And if these second arrows, as Buddha called them, come every five minutes, we have to be quite an archer to fight them off. I think of the phrase, “and this too will pass.” Bertrand Russell used to worry about everything until he realized that anything that happened to him wouldn’t affect the universe. Then he relaxed and started to enjoy life, or so he said.