Diaristic Notations

I've been drawing the same thing for 51 years. Actually maybe 53. If one does different things, they are actually doing the same thing. How can one be doing different if they are just skimming the surface of one thing or another.

So I drove past some graffiti on a pole and it was terrible graffiti. The spray can must have been old and it was all watery. And then it dripped and dripped, and later it aged. Terrible. Yet in spite of all that, it was beautiful because of the way that nature had acted upon it (and told this story).

Then I wondered how I could make judgments about a drawing. As I drove past some grass with weeds I realized that nothing in nature is poorly designed. Even when we've finished a meal our plate is perfectly composed. Why? Because a natural force (eating) organized it. So what are doing when our art (or our life?) isn't working? Being unnatural?