The Knot is Tied

The certificate came today, with a seal and signatures. We are now legal. Yea. My son called and asked what this is all about. I explained that we didn't know if we were really married. This was pre-computer. Yet they had the original. Yea for Peoria. I said that without proof marriage is just in your head. He asked, "what about with proof." I said it was still just in your head.

I was thinking of the butterfly effect when I was sitting zazen today. Without much thought, or at least thought that I don't remember, we went in 1969 to the Peoria Justice of the Peace to get a marriage license. Between that time and today we created and altered lives, some negatively and some positively. And this rather random act of getting "hitched" caused countless changes in the universe. I was contemplating some of those changes today.

We are all Amateurs and Photographers are not Artists (?)

Alfred Stieglitz said once, "if you're an amateur, and, of course, we are all amateurs..." A poster on Photoforum said (perhaps with a bit of shame) "she had no education in Art." How I envy her!

Here's a quote by Shunryu Suzuki-roshi (1905 - 1971), who was responsible for creating a vigorous Zen movement in America. "So the most difficult thing is always to keep your beginner's mind. There is no need to have a deep understanding of Zen. Even though you read much Zen literature, you must read each sentence with a fresh mind. You should not say, "I know what Zen is," or "I have attained enlightenment." This is also the real secret of the arts: always be a beginner. Be very very careful about this point. If you start to practice zazen, you will begin to appreciate your beginner's mind. It is the secret of Zen practice."

We sometimes are ashamed of our beginner's mind. I was writing a week ago about how hard it is to emulate the drawings of a child. Yet we recognize that the child's drawings are often more expressive than the adult's. The second we are not learners but "teachers" we cease projecting an excitement for the subject. Andy is a good model of someone who is always curious and looking for new ways to do things. He is never satisfied with what he already knows and is forever seeking out new challenges.

On another note, I wonder why people say "photography and art." To me, that would be like saying "women and human beings" (my wife would shoot me (deservedly)). Photography is a way of making art. On the other hand (to show that no two photographers agree), one of my teachers, Art Sinsabaugh, would become very defensive if anyone called him an artist. "I'm not an artist," he'd say, "I'm a photographer." I don't think he liked the special privileges that go with being an artist (artistic license, for example). He just wanted to show what he saw.

Wedding News

should come tomorrow. What was in the mail, wasn't, but now is.

So forty-one years plus a bunch of days later, we still wait to see if it is official. I asked for a fax, but no, licenses can't be faxed.

My wife-to-be isn't very anxious about all this. She's either confident that it is a non-issue, is taking valium, doesn't care, or has confidence that whatever we did was authentic.

Stay tuned!

Charles Bukowski and the silliness of Brooks Jensen's "criteria"

Charles Bukowski was a wonderful poet. See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRc6mHS9PjE
He's the Robert Frost of a different era.

I enjoyed (but disagreed) the talk on criteria that someone had posted by Brooks Jensen (http://www.lenswork.com/podcast/LW0639%20-%20Criteria%20Part%202.mp3), and also thought that it somewhat defines the argument on this forum. I thought it was very short-sighted in that the names he mentioned (Adams, Weston, Evans, Lange) all defined their own criteria and thumbed their nose at existing standards, just as Tina Barney and Charles Bukowski did. In fact, I sometimes look at history of art books with the idea that, as I turn the pages, each is doing something they weren't supposed to do. A curator from from MOMA once said, "Art should make you think and feel, and hopefully take you to a place you haven't been." Life is too short to be shown the same stuff over and over again. Let's break the molds.

Waiting and Mr. Obama

The 29 people in the focus group were disappointed...all but 2 of them. They didn't think he was telling things as they are (in Buddhist terms, as it is). He seemed younger than ever. And what a responsibility on his shoulders. I didn't like the times when he pitted America against others. I would like everyone to succeed. I've never understood the problem with someone making something somewhere else. They get paid in US dollars that they need to spend. Jeff will say that it costs people jobs. Yes, Jeff, but it get others jobs. It is prosperity that will trickle down, even if slowly.

On the home front, I expected to be married today. But alas, the Pony Express from Peoria to Austin must have gotten lost. Maybe our license will come tomorrow. In the meantime, we'll behave.

Tina Barney

There has been a lot of discussion on the Photoforum elist about this photo by Tina Barney. She is one of a number of contemporary photographers who are "thumbing their nose" to traditional photographic aesthetics. I contributed this statement to the list. So far, no one responded.

For me, there is an element of dada in this picture. In the same way that Marcel Duchamp put a urinal on a pedestal, we see a rather ordinary snapshot enlarged to human proportions. It opens our eyes, showing us how to see something commonplace in a very new way. Some of the commenters from the list seem to want to judge the work rather than experience it. This is a trap. The photographer is asking us to open our eyes and look at something that we might have discarded. Look at humans in this both comic and tragic theatrical setting. What do we see? How is this work more powerful and more universal than that done by a "professional" wedding photographer?

Yea...

Called Peoria County Clerk today. Said that what I was given was just a souvenir, and that the $25 certificate is in the mail.

In the mail... ha. And why wouldn't they give you something real when you get married. I had a discussion about marriage today with X. They said that marriage isn't something you do in a day, but a lifelong process. So maybe they just give you a souvenir because, like a train ticket, it just allows you to take a journey, rather than being the journey itself. The other thing we talked about was our responsibility for the other. I said that our spouse isn't our child. Aspens are not independent trees... they all share each others roots (I believe). Husbands and wives are different. They don't have to be joined at the hip.

Had another tea class today. We have a new person in the class, a Frenchman named Nicolas. It was fun seeing him struggle in his first lesson (I'm struggling in my 12th lesson), esp. since I struggled for so many years learning French. It almost kept me from getting a college degree.

Maybe others have ideas on marriage that they can share. I do know that I knew nothing when I got married. I had no understanding about having kids either.